So I ask the question, does He know what He is doing? By He, I mean God. Does He know that He is testing my sanity these days. I'm sitting here stressed and worried, AGAIN, about one of my children. My poor eldest daughter is sick and her signs and symptoms have the doctors baffled so they are sending us to PCMC this morning.
They are taking a guess at testing her for thyroid problems, but they are not sure if that is what is going on due to the fact we have no family history and she has had no problems up to now. They say we'll try this and go from here. This just has an eery sense of d'jeveau for me. The last child who had doctors baffled and was sent to PCMC for tests turned out to have terminal cancer. Not that I'm wishing or expecting that again, it's just hard not to let your mind jump immediately there.
I'm just really getting tired of visiting PCMC for my kids. It's not a great place for us. I know I should be glad that we have a children's hospital so close to us, but I would be happier If my kids could stop having to use it. I now have had half our kids up there and I really want to stop.
Is it too much to ask for God to stop testing us and putting Eric and I through the stress and heartache. I really feel like we've had our share. I just want my kids to be healthy and have a little happiness in their lives. Their lives have already been horribly changed and affected by the death of their brother. So much that my youngest daughter keeps asking is she going to die like her brother. So not a question a 5 year old should have to think and ask. My other kids get scared whenever they are sick thinking something horrible will happen to them. Eric and I just keep reassuring them that they will be fine and live a long, happy life. But how do we continue to think this if we keep getting mysterious sicknesses thrown our way with our kids. It truly is a hard thing to think when life is going good and then bam, another kid is being sent to PCMC because doctors are baffled and what is going on.
I just really do hope that God really does know what He is doing. Good or bad, my sanity is being put through the ringer. I just want my kids to be healthy! Is that too much to ask for, I think not. Well hopefully all will go well this morning and over the next few days. Maybe it will turn out to be something really silly and we can get back to normal life. Keep Alexis in your prayers!
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Monday, February 9, 2009
Although this day was tragically sad and horrible for our family I just love the pictures of the balloons. It's the one thing that the girls enjoyed because they were sending Christian his blue balloons.
We do it every year now for his birthday to send him a present. It was so great at how the balloons floated so high until we couldn't see them anymore.
We love you Christian and miss you very much!
Christian Eric Hansen 6/12/2000-2/07/2005
We always have a hard time when Feb. 7th rolls around. We decided to make it a family traditon to do some family activity that we know Christian would have enjoyed. This year we decided to take the kids to the Kangaroo Zoo, it's a bounce house in Pleasant Grove. The kids had a blast, although the boys didn't like any of the bounce stuff, so they just played with some toys. We went to lunch at the kids' favorite place, Red Robin. We then took some flowers up to Christian's grave and the girls said they missed and loved him. We said goodbye to him and had a somber ride home.
Monday, February 2, 2009
This is our lovely little girl. She is quite the mover and shaker. She is already giving me heartbreak. We had some trouble and worry with her due to she is really laying low in my tummy, but as of today she is doing good. The doctor isn't worried anymore and says she's growing good and active.
We still don't have a definite day for the C-section because the hospital has strict rules about how many days before the due date you can go in. We thought we would be able to go on the 3rd of June, but the hospital says no. The earliest they say is the 6th but that is a weekend so it will be either the 8th or 10th of June. We are hoping for the 8th so I can be home on the 12th of June and not in the hospital. The 8th would be fun because that's when I was due with Christian, but he was born on the 12th. So keep your fingers crossed that we get the 8th so we can be home on the 12th. We're excited to finally have a summer baby again. It's been a long time since we had one and I just love being outdoors with the babies.