Saturday, February 19, 2011

The Talk!


It's been an eventful Saturday in the Hansen home. The hubs and I finally sat down with the two older girls(separately) and talked to them rather openly and very frank. We have had small talks with them in the past, well-actually, I have had talks with them, but never have we sat them down and taken them through everything between a man and a woman before. We threw body part words at them, which they kinda knew already due to our talks, but we explained to them exactly what takes place during sex and making a baby.
I picked up this great book to help me prepare and then sprung it on the hubs that he was gonna sit down with me and the two older girls. Needless to say, he was less than excited. I have been meaning to do this for awhile, but life's been a tad bit crazy around here. The book recommends talking with them at age 8, which we have had talks before, just nothing quite so BIG before. We let them in on the amazing, wonderful, awesome, "secret." We also told Laney she would get to know the "secret" this year on her birthday. She's rather excited. I totally love building the "secret" up just like the book recommends, because sex is not dirty, weird, or embarrassing. It is extremely wonderful, awesome, and intense. I want our children to know and feel like they can come to us and ask us "anything." I didn't have an open relationship growing up with my folks, but I sure want my kids to have that with the hubs and I.
We were both kind of nervous to have this talk, but it actually was a lot easier than either one of us thought it would be. We stressed to them a lot on NOT doing anything until they are married, but we felt they needed to know about all the facts about sex-the why, how, who, when, and most importantly God's plan for the power a man and woman have when they come together. There were lots of questions, more from Kaleigh than Alexis(which I expected, due to Alexis's quiet-in-her-head personality), but both girls felt informed, and like they could talk/ask us anything. Mission accomplished in my book. It's a crazy world out there and we want our kids armed with everything possible so they can make the right decisions and not be left in the dark. We also feel that opening up to them and having frank discussions a lot will help them stay on the right path. We know there will be bumps and mistakes along the way, but we stressed to our girls making this mistake-having sex of any kind before marriage, is one we hope and pray they do not make. They understood and no one squirmed or felt uncomfortable which was very nice. I highly recommend reading this book. It helped me gather my thoughts and organize exactly what/how I wanted to say things. My hardest part was actually using the right terms for the parts of the body-I'm still working on this, but by the time it's little Miss Bella's turn, I'll be a pro.

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